The Wait and the Wonder

Sixteen years ago today, I was practically frantic in my desire for tomorrow morning to arrive because that was the day my baby was coming! I had an appointment to be induced on October 10, 1991 at Grace Womens’ Hospital in Calgary and I’d just spent the last 15 days feeling cheated. How could anyone be so callous as to promise me I would have a baby by September 24th and then not deliver on that promise? How could they make me wait it out for 15 long days? Why couldn’t they just take it out on the 24th and relieve me of the anticipation? Wasn’t it baked enough after 9 months?

I had no idea.

I had no idea about whether I was having a girl or a boy (I had a hunch it was a boy though. I’m intuitive like that.).

I had no idea that the next day I would fall so deeply, madly in love that I would never recover…nor would I want to. I mean, I was already “in love” with this little mystery within my body, how could that love become bigger? It did.

I had no idea what that little baby girl was about to do to my life.  How she would upend it.  Mix it up.  Rearrange it.  Make it all worth it.

I had no idea about feeding schedules and diaper blowouts and sleeplessness. First steps and jumping in puddles and picking up rocks to take home as treasures. Daycare and Barney and kindergarten and Disney Princesses and training wheels. Swimming lessons and soccer games and birthday parties. High school and make-up and crushes and dances.

I had no idea, on this day 16 years ago, how fast it would all fly by. How I would be required to learn it all in a fleeting moment.

Just how did we get from the day before your birthday in 1991 to today?

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Zeenee Zeeta, Seniorita, tomorrow is your Sweet 16. Happy Birthday to my beautiful, smart, incredibly wonderful girl. I am so proud of you.

P.S. I have no idea about driving lessons and college applications and grad dresses…

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14 responses to this post.

  1. Stop it! You’re making me cry. I can’t believe my daughter is THREE. Are you telling me that they turn 16???

    WHAT??

    (i also join NaBloPoMo. hope i make it!)

    Reply

  2. Aw, I love these birthday posts. So sweet. Happy birthday to Ashely.

    Reply

  3. Happy birthday, lovely girl!

    Reply

  4. Posted by JC on October 10, 2007 at 6:53 pm

    Awh your daughter has gorgeous eyes! Wish her a happy brithday!

    Reply

  5. Posted by JC on October 10, 2007 at 6:54 pm

    *for me

    Reply

  6. I’m so glad I can access your blog again! For awhile there it said that I needed a password and I thought I may have to delete the link.

    Happy 16th to your daughter-she’s beautiful!

    Reply

  7. Happy Birthday to Ashley!

    Also can you email me your current email address? The one I have for you bounced.

    Reply

  8. I guess girls don’t wear pink frilly dresses anymore for grad huh?

    Oooooh 16.

    Reply

  9. Dear Ashley,

    May your birthday truly be something special this year, as well as every day that precedes and follows it.

    Reply

  10. May god bless you(your daughter) in this beautiful day to get all your wishes true,
    Happy birthday cute little 16.

    Reply

  11. Happy Birthday…
    Browser on internet u can find everything for college application and u r study tool…
    i had on idea what that little baby girl was about to do to my life..
    wish u good luck for the feature..

    Reply

  12. Wish you a happy birthday sweet 16. May this birthday brings all your wishes comes true.

    Reply

  13. Many more happy returns of the day dear 16…… “always have more fun
    by enjoying what you do it’s all the journey “

    Reply

  14. Posted by CanadianCarrie on October 30, 2007 at 6:39 pm

    My October baby just turned 5 and I have NO idea how it happened, where the years went! Hope she had a wonderful celebration!

    P.S. I’m so glad I can see your blog now, although I was thinking about signing up for wordpress JUST to read your blog! I’m that dedicated;)

    Reply

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